Kristin Neff
on Practicing Fierce Self-Compassion
Listen:
Show Notes:
We tend to think of self-compassion as an act of gentleness, and the tender side of self-compassion is all about soothing, reassuring and accepting ourselves. But sometimes getting angry, saying no and taking action is the most compassionate thing you can do for yourself, and that’s where fierce self-compassion comes in.
In this episode of Noble Mind, Dr. Neff joins Kate and Alex to discuss her new book, Fierce Self-Compassion, explaining how fierce self-compassion gets expressed as protecting, providing for and motivating ourselves. She introduces us to the difference between fierce and tender self-compassion, describing how gender role socialization hinders our ability to access both. Listen in for Dr. Neff’s insight on self-compassion as a spiritual practice and learn how the expression of anger can serve as an act of compassion.
Kristin Neff is currently an Associate Professor of Educational Psychology at the University of Texas at Austin. She’s a pioneer in the field of self-compassion research, conducting the 1st empirical studies on self-compassion nearly 20 years ago. She’s author of the bestselling book Self-Compassion. Along with her colleague Chris Germer, she developed the Mindful Self-Compassion program, taught worldwide, and co-wrote The Mindful Self-Compassion Workbook. Her newest book is Fierce Self-Compassion: How Women Can Harness Kindness to Speak Up, Claim Their Power, and Thrive. To take a self-compassion test, find research articles, or download guided meditations, go to www.self-compassion.org.
Key Takeaways:
- The difference between fierce and tender self-compassion (and why everyone needs both)
- How fierce self-compassion gets expressed as protecting, providing and motivating
- How the #MeToo movement served as Dr. Neff’s motivation to write Fierce Self-Compassion
- How #MeToo, anti-racism, wealth inequality and climate change are all compassion movements
- Why you can’t understand the blocks to self-compassion without understanding gender roles
- How the moment-to-moment acceptance of our experience facilitates effective action
- Dr. Neff’s insight on how self-compassion opens the door to a rich spiritual practice
- Dr. Neff’s advice around starting your own fierce self-compassion practice
- How anger functions as a protective emotion to make us brave and give us power
Resources:
- Fierce Self-Compassion: How Women Can Harness Kindness to Speak Up, Claim Their Power and Thrive by Kristin Neff, PhD
- Self-Compassion: The Proven Power of Being Kind to Yourself by Kristin Neff, PhD
- The Mindful Self-Compassion Workbook: A Proven Way to Accept Yourself, Build Inner Strength and Thrive by Kristin Neff, PhD, and Christopher Germer, PhD
- Thich Nhat Hanh
- Chris Germer
- Self-Compassion Test
- Center for Mindful Self-Compassion
Recent Past Episodes:
Hosts:
Katherine King, PsyD
Katherine King, PsyD is a clinical psychologist and assistant professor of psychology at William James College. She was trained in evidence-based treatments within the Veterans’ Administration and has a private practice specializing in geropsychology. She is also a member of the Boston Shambhala Center Board of Directors, a vajrayana student of Buddhism, and has practiced meditation for over 20 years. Learn more about Kate at www.drkateking.com.
Alex Gokce, MSW
Alex Gokce, MSW has a master’s degree in social work from Salem State University and an undergraduate degree in Comparative Government from Harvard University. He has led psychotherapy groups on topics including mindfulness, cognitive-behavioral therapy, and mind-body approaches to pain management. He has co-led programs at the Boston Shambhala Center on the topics of trauma and self-compassion. His personal and professional interests center around the individual, societal and intergenerational impacts of trauma, as well as the sociocultural roots of interpersonal harm.
Disclaimer: Please note that the information shared in this podcast is strictly for educational purposes only, and is not intended as psychological treatment or consultation of any kind.
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